Success Under Stress by Sharon Melnick

Author:Sharon Melnick [Melnick, Sharon]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: AMACOM Books
Published: 2013-06-08T04:00:00+00:00

Type II: Disapproval Preventing Behavior

This second pattern illustrates behaviors intended not to gain other people’s approval, but rather to prevent their disapproval. As you can see in Figure 6.4, people who exhibit this behavior pattern have doubts about how smart, capable, or worthy they are (as shown in the lower left-hand corner of the diagram). The motivation (as shown moving up the left-hand side of the triangle) is to prevent others from discovering these perceived flaws or deficits. It’s important that no one else knows about these doubts, lest they lose respect (down the right-hand side of the triangle).

The reasoning is that when we give significant weight to others’ opinions, their critical feedback could be personally deflating. Such a negative emotional downward spiral would certainly interfere with achieving the end-state of confidence at the core.

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